A Good Marriage

After being happily married for more than 39 years, Dr. Phil shares some of his thoughts about what makes a marriage work:

The quality of a relationship is a function of the extent to which it is built on a solid underlying friendship and meets the needs of the two people involved.
You get what you give. When you give better, you get better.
If you put your relationship in a win/lose situation, it will be a lose/lose situation.
Forget whether you’re right or wrong. The question is: Is what you’re doing working or not working?
There is no right or wrong way to fix a relationship. Find your own way that works. But recognize when it’s not working and be honest when it needs fixing.
Falling in love is not the same thing as being in love. Embrace the change and know that it takes work.
You don’t fix things by fixing your partner.
Intimacy is so important because it is when we let someone else enter our private world.
You don’t necessarily solve problems. You learn how to manage them.
Communicate. Make sure your sentences have verbs. Remember that only 7 percent of communication is verbal. Actions and non-verbal communication speak much louder.
You teach people how to treat you. You can renegotiate the rules.

Originally Published: http://www.drphil.com/articles/article/53
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